This week has been a big one for me. It marks my first week of a part time work schedule, which I will continue through October before officially retiring from my job of 6 years. To many, my limited hours and decision to stop working all together by the time I reach 27 weeks may seem premature, but for me, it's what needs to be.
Although we have (knock on wood) been fairly lucky thus far, and had only one unplanned visit to my OB's office which turned out totally okay, I haven't enjoyed this pregnancy to it's fullest..Let me rephrase that as to not sound like an ungrateful brat- I totally 100% appreciate the chance we have at parenthood...and I know there are many couples out there who are still in waiting, whether it be through infertility treatments or adoption--and my heart goes out to them-but the anxiety I have over this pregnancy has given me a run for my money.
Every week, it's something new to worry about..first it was getting a heartbeat, then it was making it to the second trimester, then it was passing the quad screen and making it to 20 weeks...now it's making it to tomorrow...
24 weeks- that's THE week. THE week that changed our lives forever last time around..THE week that taught us what it's like to grieve over loss, and to soldier on...THE week that got me dreaming of someday bringing another baby home that we'd be able to raise.
So, with the arrival of THE week, I'm understandably nervous.
This quote has been floating around pinterest for the last week or so, and I need to tattoo it to my forehead...
"99% of the things we worry about never happen."
I sure hope this is true, and that for once, just once, ahem not the 1% whose worry comes true.
I hope this week is peaceful and uneventful for you. I remember THE week for us too as we went through our rainbow pregnancy...it was 23 weeks and I was a nervous wreck (more than usual).
ReplyDeletePregnancy after loss is not sunshine and roses. Even after getting past that week for us, it was still hard, because I worried about everything. And you are right...first it's hearing the heartbeat, the first trimester, feeling the movements, the quad screen, making it to viability...the list goes on and on.
Take it one day at a time, and know that there are people out there who understand. We may not have ever met, but I understand your feelings oh so well.
Thinking of you!
And of course, it seems to be the things we never thought of worrying about that really take us down for the count. So, I guess it really doesn't make sense to worry, right??
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