Last week was pure chaos, with three Doctor appointments, playgroup and school taking up a good portion of each day. I'm not used to being so busy, but it really does feel great to accomplish things. For the last couple of years, I spent more hours on my couch than I probably have in my whole life. Okay, exaggeration--but yeah, my sofa in Wuxi probably has a dent in it from the hours I logged just sitting at home with the kids. I did get out almost every day, but it was different. It was without purpose.
Now that we are stateside and back in my element, I'm able to do things that matter. I'm able to mail off my own package at the post office, schedule, drive to, and complete a doctor's appointment, get groceries, sort out utility payments.....it's endless. I know it's all normal everyday life, but for me, it's new again. I actually feel like I have more worth. I feel smart again. Being illiterate for a couple of years is quite humbling.
That being said, my kids, who have not been used to the faster paced life we live in the states--might be feeling it. Or at least that's what I'm telling myself as my two and a half year morphs into his evil alter ego come 4:30 each evening. For two and a half hours, I play referee as he tries to headlock his little sister and steamroll her. If she is playing quietly by herself, he has to intervene. It's maddening. There have been lots of NO's from his mouth and quite a few screaming to the point of choking tantrums over something as simple as me telling him to stop opening and closing the dishwasher door.
And guess what?
This mama is tired.
I wrote NZ an email the other night admitting that there are days that I count down the hours til bedtime. I haaaaate feeling that way, but it's the honest truth. Somedays, parenting just plain wears me out and bedtime can't come soon enough. I'm sure I'm not the first parent to feel this way, and I'm probably not the last. Here's to hoping that this phase passes quickly and the tantrums lose their frequency as he realizes that they won't get him anywhere.
In the meantime.....
Dear Santa, can I have some noise cancelling headphones?