We've got mail!

My sister spoils us. 

This months care package included a whole lot of stoke. 

Sal made out like a bandit with a Tonka set and police badge from uncle Juls, and custom excavator cookies from aunt Stephanie. 

I came in second with all of this elastic for headbands. I've got enough to make a few sizes and will probably make some gifts for friends. 

Carla got some leggings and she and Nick both got some reading material. A few books for her, and a Surfer magazine for him. You know--just to make him miss the ocean more, lol. 

But really, we've loved and appreciated all of the care packages we've been sent over the last few years. It's not cheap, and it's not easy to ship to China. So, the fact that people have gone out of their way to send a slice of home has made us feel remembered while we are away. 

California dreamin'

We've been back from California for a week now, and have finally re acclimated to life in China. Thankfully, we do better with the time change and jetlag coming west, better than when we fly east. One or two nights of waking and we were all sleeping like babies again.

We had a great visit home, although I admit, it was my most exhausting trip thus far. I blame pregnancy, jetlag and a non-napping toddler. Exhaustion aside, trips home are always just what the doctor ordered.

Some highlights included:

Dinner with longtime friends and their kids. Sal got to sit at the big kid table for the first time with Maverick and Makayla. We look forward to many more good dinners and play dates with these two and their parents.

Breakfast at grandma Sandy and grandpa Bob's house. Fresh picked oranges (although I think the fruit pictured was a lemon) and cherry tomatoes. Isn't that what every kid begs for at breakfast? 

Decorating Halloween cookies with Auntie Stephanie. My sister made cookies and flooded them with white royal icing. She then drew Halloween themed designs on them and gave Sal edible ink markers to decorate them. It's been reported that he taste tested each cookie--nick and I took the opportunity to get away to the surf shops while Auntie Steph kept Sal entertained.

Shopping with auntie Steph and grandma Sandy. 

Feeding grandpa Jet's doggies. Sal even pronounced their names "Tess" and "Kate" and took an instant liking to them. Since our visit home, Sal thinks he is a doggie. He often puts his snack on the floor and eats it like a dog and hides out in our pet kennel.

The beach! We spent so many mornings at the beach. 

High school football. We got to watch Sal's future high school (his dad's alma mater) play a game. Who knows, someday maybe I'll be sitting in these stands cheering this little guy on. 

We had many more good times with family and friends that didn't get pictured. Our two weeks flew by, as always, and before we knew it, we were faced with packing up all our stuff and heading out again.

Until next time, California!

Seven-twenty-twentythree

      Seven years married. Twenty month old son.

              Twenty three weeks pregnant.

                         I'm a lucky girl.

            Happy anniversary to my sunshine!

Home

                         

                                     My newest faux chalkboard creation

When Nick and I decided to make the move overseas, we liked the idea of having to "make it on our own". Figuring out a new city, culture, language..just the two of us, mano y mano. Turns out we have had help figuring it all out, in the form of fellow expats, and a handful of locals, but really, it's been me and him, him and me....and of course Sal, trudging through the day to day trials and tribulations of living in such a foreign country.

I'm glad we are here. I'm thankful for this experience.

Do I dream about the day we board a flight to LAX with one way tickets? Absolutely.

Southern California is where our roots are, and where we look forward to calling home again.

But for now, we live by a verse from Edward Sharpe and the magnificent zeros, which hangs in our dining room to remind us that "home is wherever I'm with you". It could be anywhere in the World, as long as we're together. 

Parrrrrrty's heeyah

 

I've been sitting on the computer this evening, editing pictures from yesterday, and I can not believe our son just turned one.
 

I am ONE.

We had a couple other birthday celebrants join us for a small lunchtime party on Saturday. NZ had a birthday last Wednesday, our friend Pere had a birthday on Thursday, and Anna shares Sal's January 13th birthdate, so we had them over to join us for spaghetti arribata, sushi, cookies and cake in celebration of all their years of life.

Cookies from sweet creations by Stephanie

 

Sal & Neil (newest baby on the block)

            
            Sal ate cake, opened gifts and played with his new toys before a nice long nap.



yes,  that's most definitely a boog hanging from the nose.
(He's had a cold all week and finally gifted it to me today)

Dad had to help with the blowing out of the candle.
Sal was obviously mesmerized by the mamarazi.

 

As the day turned to night, we met up with more friends from our apartment complex to light off fireworks to celebrate Sal turning ONE!
  

This one's for you, kid.

What we did on Christmas Vacation

Well, not exactly Christmas vacation, but PRC observes the New Year as a holiday, and includes a few extra days surrounding January 1st as off days. This means that NZ actually had a few days to relax and hang out with us. Nevermind the fact that when China has a few days off, they then work through the following weekend to make up for days off---so yes, NZ will be working 9 days straight this next week.

But, it's been great to have him home for a stretch of time. We've really enjoyed some lazy mornings playing video games, and cooking while Sal naps--then heading out for a walk or errands afterwards.

Here are some pictures of what we did on our Christmas vacation.

Sal got another haircut

Our sous chef hard at work

We walked by a city garden

NZ made meatuh-balls



We had our first snow watched TV in sweatpants

We saw a scooter driving down the escalator

And got lots of hugs from dad

A nice way to send 2012 out, and welcome in a New Year.

Grateful:Day 2: Skype Dates

Day two: I am grateful for Skype dates with our family and friends back home.

Sal & NZ skype with grandpa Dennis

During the week, I usually log on my Skype account mid morning to see who might be on back home. We are fifteen hours ahead of California-- so 11:00 am here on Wednesday is 8:00pm on Tuesday back home. Most mornings, if Sal and I are home between 10:00 and 11:00, I spend the hour skyping with friends and family (mostly my sister or mom). On the weekends, we Skype with My dad and my grandmother.

Living abroad would be much harder not being able to see the faces of those I miss. My sister and I sit and chat (and run for bathroom or "wait a second, my oven timer is buzzing" breaks) while leaving Skype running. We go about our daily routine, just as if the other is sitting in our living room. I LOVE this. I set Sal up in a highchair in front of the iPad like the E-trade baby and I'm certain he is going to think his family and mama's friends all live in the computer.

I learned about Skype when NZ was in India for two months. We would Skype every morning and evening. I still missed him tons, but learned that the distance is made easier when you can see the other person. When we found out we were moving to China, I knew that Skype access was key for making life easier here, and I was oh so right.

Top 8 things we're missing

I've been asked more than a few times if there is anything we miss from home over here. Aside from family and friends ( which is a given), the answer is YES.

There are definitely things we miss from home, but all in all, China has been treating us well so far. We haven't found everything we WANT, but we do find most things that we NEED or things that will suffice for the time being.

So what do we miss?

1- Our bed. More precisely, our memory foam mattress. Our apartment came with a kingsize two metre bed, but the mattress leaves a lot to be desired. It's like we're glamping ( glamorous camping for those not in-the-know) everynight. I think our hardwood floors might be softer than the mattress. No joke. So, we're searching stores here for a memory foam mattress topper.

2- Our own vehicle. Hailing taxis is easy. Finding a taxi with working seatbelts to belt our son in the car is challenging. On average, we pass up 3-4 taxis each time we try to travel by taxi because of the lack of seatbelts. Also, if traveling during rush hour, and trying to get somewhere away from downtown, the taxi drivers will tell us they can't take us and pass us up! This is because they start their rides with a flat10RMB, and then charge additional for mileage. So they make more money doing a lot of short rides and collecting 10 RMB for 4 rides than they do if they take us somewhere further and charge mileage plus the 10RMB. It's ridiculously maddening when we finally find a taxi with seatbelts, get in, tell the driver where we want to go, and he won't take us there.
We usually have a driver during the week, which is nice because he helps me load the carseat and stroller into his car and will wait for me to do my errands. In fact, the other day, he took me and some of the girls out to lunch and literally gave us door to door service. But, there is nothing like being able to jump in your own car and head out to your destination. I miss the freedom of being able to go anywhere, anytime, with very little effort.

3- Cottage Cheese. I'm a cottage cheese fiend. Can not find it ANYWHERE here. I think I'm going to have withdrawls.

4- Ocean Breezes. Considering it's over 90 degrees and 90% humidity most days, I'd kill for a one gust of clean ocean air.

5- Target. Need I say more? Hey American friends, did you know that we're spoiled by having a one stop shop at our disposal? Uhm, yeah. We are. Just so you know. I've always loved Target, but I am quite certain it really is a shopper's paradise. I have dreams about being able to go to ONE store and find EVERYTHING I need and want. One day we shall be re-united, and what a glorious day that will be.

6- Rhineland Deli. Our Saturday sandwich joint. Oh-em-gee, we miss those decadent sandwiches piled high with deli meats, fresh produce ( mmm, avocado!) and cheese. Somehow, our hormel ham and american cheese sandwiches that we can make here just don't compare.

7- Surfing. I catch NZ watching youtube videos and checking surfline in the mornings. I think his boards will make the trip over here next time we go home. There are some fantastic surf destinations in Indonesia, which we are a hop skip and a vacation away from. It's hard to take the beach away from a boy born with sand between his toes.

8- Sewing & Baking. I swear that getting pinterest access here is a cruel joke someone is playing on me. I can pin my little heart out, only to realize that I have no way of making such projects. I have yet to find any retail fabric shops, and only one sewing machine ( at IKEA). Until I find fabric here, I don't see the point in buying a machine, and really, I'd prefer a Singer or Janome machine if I can be picky here. Baking is pretty hard to do with a countertop toaster oven, although it is possible. Just difficult. I successfully burnt a batch of flourless peanut butter cookies in the oven's maiden voyage a few weeks ago. I'm building up my confidence to give that celcius thermostat another go. One of these days I will bake the most beautiful 6 cookies this side of  Wuxi New District.

Other than those silly things we miss, it's been good here. I'm enjoying exploring shopping areas with new friends; Sal is enjoying playing with other babies, and feeding the koi with his dad;and Nick is enjoying evenings out  finding good sushi and burger joints with the fellas.

5 years, already?

It seems like just yesterday that we woke up to this elaborately decorated Jetta.

But in fact, it was 2006.

That's 5 whole years since this happened...

Can it really be?

September 23, 2006.

That was really 5 years ago?Already?

Thank you sunshine, for sweeping this girl off of her feet when she wasn't looking. You've been everything and more than I ever thought I deserved in a husband.

I look forward to cooking your breakfast every morning till I'm old and gray, and you've become my silver fox.

I'm pretty sure that's a deal we can both live with.

Daisy Love

Please keep the Merrick family in your thoughts as their 5 year old daughter faces a recurring Wilms tumor. If the last name sounds familar to Southern Californians, it's because the Merrick family is deeply rooted in the surf culture. Britt runs REALITY church, and his father Al is a world famous surfboard shaper based out of Santa Barbara. I know they have faith, and people praying for them, but a dose of good fortune could sure do a lot for them.

Beware, the video will get tears going, so have a box of tissues ready. Daisy Love is a brave little lady and I hope that she beats the odds. She has way too much life to live ahead of her.

The family has a website called Pray for Daisy and are currently looking for specialists in treatment of Wilms tumors. If anyone has direct contact with a specialist in this type of cancer, please email the family through their website.

GB: A sister's perspective

A while back, my sister, Stephanie, at Sweetcreationsbystephanie.com asked me if I would like to guest blog about some of my sweet treats. I've entertained the idea for a few weeks, and have finally decided what I want to guest blog (GB) about...In exchange, I asked her to share an aunt's perspective on the loss of her niece, and her relationship with me over the past year. I thought this might help out the family members of other BL parents, since there doesn't seem to be a whole lot out there directed at family members who certainly feel the loss as well.

From Stephanie...

As an aunt, a sister, a sister in law .. this has been one of the most challenging years I've ever experienced in my 38 years. Thinking back to the beginning of 2009, there was so much happiness in our family. We were all so excited for Nick & Brie. After a loss in 2008, we felt 2009 was going to be the year that they would finally have their baby. Taking myself back to late April when we found out Baby Z was a healthy baby girl..I remember pure excitement & relief to hear she was healthy. I don't think I put the phone down before I was already ordering a custom onesie that said "My Auntie Steph thinks I'm the cutest baby ever". It was true, without even seeing her, I knew she would hold my heart forever. What I didn't know was she would keep a part of it...and make part of it lost forever. One year from her birth, I still wonder what could have been...5 years from now, I will still wonder... it's a piece of me...of our family that will always be a unknown.

Being an immediate family member has proven to be tough at times... I became a major part of my sister's support system. At first you don't have time to think about how you feel...it's all about them. At some point you stop, you realize what YOU have lost..a niece, a nephew.. a part of your family and you grieve. My sister and I are very close. She knows I never judge her, she knows I will always support her, we've been though a lot, especially over the last 15 years.. through it all, we will always be there for one another in good times & bad. I tend to be the mediator of the family, I want everyone to be happy and content. I had to realize that I could not fix this for anyone... all I could do was listen and all I could say is "I'm sorry".

Unless you've lost a child you can not say "I know what you are going through" or "You're young, you still have plenty of time"... it doesn't make the parent feel any better about their loss. The best thing to do is be there, don't be afraid to talk about the baby, listen to them and give them the support they need. Supporting the parents is the best thing you can do.

I have become very sensitive to how children are treated by their parents. I hear a mother yell, "Stop that, you are such a brat." I cringe & think to myself, "She really doesn't know how lucky she is to have that child." Never take for granted what you have, it can be lost in a heartbeat.

I hope that someday soon, my sister and brother in law will have a happy healthy lil' one in their arms ... a lil' one that an auntie can spoil with lots of love. I'm so very proud of the two of them... they've made it through something that many couples are not strong enough to get through.

Steph